I have a perfect story book ending....
Yesterday during dinner P said if email guy would have asked her to marry him, she might have answered yes.....unfortunately email guy has been missing for the past 6 months..... that's when I told her my theory...... perhaps email guy is giving himself a 6 month period to wait and see and decide if he still needs her in his life and if the answer is yes, then he will come to her... I told her that he is going to come and tell her that the last 6 months were the worst 6 months in his entire life as he was not able to talk to her, see her, be with her, and not tell her why he did that and etc....then he will go to his knees and ask her to marry him.....and eventhough she would be so angry with him for disappearing for 6 months.....love takes over and she will just fall into his arms and accepts him and they will live happily forever........
She looked up at me and she said "ya....this is only going to happen in a story book..." of course I tambah sikit here and there la.....but seriously...how nice if this is real..email guy comes and proposes and they do live happily ever after......I can pray ......I can hope......I can wish.......but end of the day.....it is still in God's hands......
I told P, this is the romantic fool in me that came up with the ending....Krshna, will I ever grow up and face reality???
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Thursday, October 8, 2009
A J
The first guy who proposed marriage to me....
I got to know AJ when he was in Scotland...it was 1995.....I was planning to go to Glasgow to do my masters and when I surfed for info, I came across Uni of Strathclyde... I mailed their student support and received an email from AJ...and that was the beginning of a beautiful friendship...
AJ was a sweet Delhi-walla who was doing his Masters in International Business, he was single and he was nice...we wrote emails initially till he went back to Delhi and our emails became snail mails and we write...both of us...and when I mean by writing, I am talking about receiving aletter 8 or 10 pages long and I will match the length as well...
We really got to know each other well during those years of writing...we have never spoken on the phone... 1 day, AJ's work took him to Jakarta and from Jakarta he flew to Bangkok and later back home. It was in Bangkok airport that he called me...I was just entering my house when the phone rang and I guess I was shocked to know it was him...we spoke for a while...I was quiet...yeap...that was seriously not me!! He told me that when flying from Jakarta to Bangkok, he knew he was passing Penang and he was wishing that the plane would just stopover in Penang...he was sweet...
He went back to Delhi and the next thing I knew, I recieved an express mail...he was asking for my jathagam...he had told his family his intention to marry me...he calls me his international bride...it was 1997..I just lost my appa...and I could not bring myself to leave my family to be with him...I was young..scared of the unknown...new language, new people...and I said no...
End of 1997, I went to South India and the moment I set foot in Chennai, I called him...I will tell him where I will be staying and will give my hotel details and I know in the evening he will call me and we will talk for hours...whenever possible, I will call him...I got very familiar with STDs in South India..I will look for them whereever we went...from Ooty to Mysore to Tanjavoor... he kept telling me to come to Delhi...just take a flight and come and meet my family...that is what he told me....
In Feb 1998, he got married to a girl of his family's choice...nope...it did not break my heart...I love AJ but at the same time I knew I won't fit into his environment....
I did meet him...in 1999...the moment I saw him...I received a big hug....I know how much we loved each other.... his wife was not with him at that time, she was back in her mom's house...it was good to have met him...eventhough we did not say anything to each other but we knew we had something special...his mom was scared that we would do something...so she will always send a chaperone :-)
Anyway, lots of things happened in our lives.... till today we are good friends.....I know if he is okay or not by just looking at the hello in his mails....he will always send me an email the moment I think about him and somehow I know something is not right with him in my heart....
A couple of months back.....he made me cry.... he said he knew how we felt for each other but alas it was not meant to be.....I know that too......if he asked me now if I will marry him.....the answer will be......yes, without a single doubt in my heart and mind........
I got to know AJ when he was in Scotland...it was 1995.....I was planning to go to Glasgow to do my masters and when I surfed for info, I came across Uni of Strathclyde... I mailed their student support and received an email from AJ...and that was the beginning of a beautiful friendship...
AJ was a sweet Delhi-walla who was doing his Masters in International Business, he was single and he was nice...we wrote emails initially till he went back to Delhi and our emails became snail mails and we write...both of us...and when I mean by writing, I am talking about receiving aletter 8 or 10 pages long and I will match the length as well...
We really got to know each other well during those years of writing...we have never spoken on the phone... 1 day, AJ's work took him to Jakarta and from Jakarta he flew to Bangkok and later back home. It was in Bangkok airport that he called me...I was just entering my house when the phone rang and I guess I was shocked to know it was him...we spoke for a while...I was quiet...yeap...that was seriously not me!! He told me that when flying from Jakarta to Bangkok, he knew he was passing Penang and he was wishing that the plane would just stopover in Penang...he was sweet...
He went back to Delhi and the next thing I knew, I recieved an express mail...he was asking for my jathagam...he had told his family his intention to marry me...he calls me his international bride...it was 1997..I just lost my appa...and I could not bring myself to leave my family to be with him...I was young..scared of the unknown...new language, new people...and I said no...
End of 1997, I went to South India and the moment I set foot in Chennai, I called him...I will tell him where I will be staying and will give my hotel details and I know in the evening he will call me and we will talk for hours...whenever possible, I will call him...I got very familiar with STDs in South India..I will look for them whereever we went...from Ooty to Mysore to Tanjavoor... he kept telling me to come to Delhi...just take a flight and come and meet my family...that is what he told me....
In Feb 1998, he got married to a girl of his family's choice...nope...it did not break my heart...I love AJ but at the same time I knew I won't fit into his environment....
I did meet him...in 1999...the moment I saw him...I received a big hug....I know how much we loved each other.... his wife was not with him at that time, she was back in her mom's house...it was good to have met him...eventhough we did not say anything to each other but we knew we had something special...his mom was scared that we would do something...so she will always send a chaperone :-)
Anyway, lots of things happened in our lives.... till today we are good friends.....I know if he is okay or not by just looking at the hello in his mails....he will always send me an email the moment I think about him and somehow I know something is not right with him in my heart....
A couple of months back.....he made me cry.... he said he knew how we felt for each other but alas it was not meant to be.....I know that too......if he asked me now if I will marry him.....the answer will be......yes, without a single doubt in my heart and mind........
Monday, June 22, 2009
A proposal
Someone proposed to me......
Oh god, this guy I chatted with proposed to me after chatting with me in less than 30 minutes, he made me laugh and then he made me think...... These days I am happy being me but at times I feel lonely and I do wish I have someone to share my happiness/ life with.
What the guy made me think was .... will I just accept anyone coz I am lonely and all that I want is to belong to someone? That made me think really hard and I started talking to Krshna.... I asked Krshna to think carefully on what He wants me to do as He would know how crazy I can be... I know I will be find... I also know if I do do something crazy, I will still not regret it.. I will say...everything happens for a reason! and move on with life......
To the guy who proposed to me......I did not continue chatting him.....
Oh god, this guy I chatted with proposed to me after chatting with me in less than 30 minutes, he made me laugh and then he made me think...... These days I am happy being me but at times I feel lonely and I do wish I have someone to share my happiness/ life with.
What the guy made me think was .... will I just accept anyone coz I am lonely and all that I want is to belong to someone? That made me think really hard and I started talking to Krshna.... I asked Krshna to think carefully on what He wants me to do as He would know how crazy I can be... I know I will be find... I also know if I do do something crazy, I will still not regret it.. I will say...everything happens for a reason! and move on with life......
To the guy who proposed to me......I did not continue chatting him.....
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Wedding anniversary
It was my wedding anniversary yesterday.....
I got married on a full moon day in the month of May, 2006....I had a very very simple wedding, my best friends were there, only immediate family members...hardly 30 people were there....and I cried when Kutty tied the thalli around my neck....3 of my good friends were the ones who told me not to cry...they knew how important it was for me....
Yesterday I told P tat I am not crying...but inside me....tat was a different story....I donno if this is how everyone else feels when they are divorced and they face to their wedding anniversary....how do people cope with all these?
I am seriously thinking of writing a book on how to handle a separation / divorce...how to handle questions from others...how to tell people you are okay when you are not....how to handle birthdays, anniversary, special occasions and life......
Is this wrong to feel down? Am I suppose to be smiling today? It was a lovely wedding saree...I had my favourite colour...purple....Krshna help me please......I stood infront of you on that day and I prayed that you'll take care of us.......Krshna.........please listen to my voice......I need you now........
I got married on a full moon day in the month of May, 2006....I had a very very simple wedding, my best friends were there, only immediate family members...hardly 30 people were there....and I cried when Kutty tied the thalli around my neck....3 of my good friends were the ones who told me not to cry...they knew how important it was for me....
Yesterday I told P tat I am not crying...but inside me....tat was a different story....I donno if this is how everyone else feels when they are divorced and they face to their wedding anniversary....how do people cope with all these?
I am seriously thinking of writing a book on how to handle a separation / divorce...how to handle questions from others...how to tell people you are okay when you are not....how to handle birthdays, anniversary, special occasions and life......
Is this wrong to feel down? Am I suppose to be smiling today? It was a lovely wedding saree...I had my favourite colour...purple....Krshna help me please......I stood infront of you on that day and I prayed that you'll take care of us.......Krshna.........please listen to my voice......I need you now........
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