Me

Me...who am I?

I have been defined as fierce, chatterbox, loving, sensitive or over sensitive, loud mouth and many more. I have endured all that. We do this, we give titles for people....she is always like that, very dominant, no wonder no man wants her.... A sentence I have heard too many times. I have come across this statement too...you are too fat, no man wants a fat girl, loose weight and you will find a guy...

Question is, have I survived all these? The answer, yes, am not surprised anymore with what anyone says about me. But over the weekend, someone close to me said that I am living a cursed life. It just hit me hard but I was surprised I didn't react. Perhaps, I have become too immune to everything thrown to me. Why a cursed life? What is a cursed life?

My life isn't perfect. I don't know what is the definition of a perfect life but I like my life. I have my ups and downs day but during my down days, I have my friends to lift me up. Perhaps I don't have that 1 person I can go home to tell him my day, but I honestly have not one but many friends I can tell what a crappy day I had.

Last night was chatting with 2 ladies in my life, 2 of us will be 47 this year and the other 44. We made a pack, no more crying for others, we shall live our lives the best we can and on our terms. If we need to cry buckets of tears, we will do it together as we truly understand each other.

This got me thinking, when you cry at 7 or 17 or 27 or 37 or 47, it is still tears, it still hurts, only the reasons and issues changes. I know I have changed and I am still changing. I am learning to be true to myself, true to my beliefs, true to my thoughts. This is my life, if I can't be the person I want to be now, when else can I then? I am far from perfect, I can be a pain, I know I am coz sometimes I shake my head looking at myself. But this is me, this is the path I have chosen, if this means I have to walk alone, so be it. 

I am meeting wonderful and not so wonderful people on this journey of my life. I have a blessed life, I have so many things to be thankful for me, my love for my Upperwalla is just love, I have no words to describe this love...I am blessed to all the little things I enjoy in life, the rain, the rainbow, the sunshine...and the list keeps growing. I am blessed with good friends, I love my kids. Well, cursed or not or blessed or not, this is my life!

My tag line for this year...be true to yourself...love life..